You are never too old to spice up your relationship with a romantic mood for Valentine’s Day, a special birthday or just as a romantic surprise for your spouse or sweetheart. In fact, a romantic mood might be just what you need to fire up the flames of love. Taking the time will definitely pay off.
Creating magical moments in your relationship is something everyone thinks about, but few people do. Perhaps it’s because they actually can’t think of exactly what to do.
according to Barton Goldsmith Ph.D. in Psychology Today.
How do you set a romantic mood? Do you dine in or go out on the town? There are some important elements of a romantic mood that apply either way.
Tip #1 Anticipate & Plan
Prepare everything ahead of time. Whether it is the restaurant reservations or the menu you plan to serve at home. Decide if your special evening is to be a surprise or shared with your partner. Personally, I think it can be fun to share the anticipation of a romantic get together. However, I like to keep at least some element of mystery that I can add as a surprise. If you both anticipate the private time together, it can add joy to the event for both parties. Although there are romantic moments that are spontaneous, more often they are planned.
Tip #2 Eliminate Distractions
Just get rid of the distractions so you have no one or nothing to spoil a special romantic mood. Whether that is turning off the phones, the TV, getting rid of clutter, parking the kids or pets somewhere else, etc. If you have a house full, consider spending the night at a Bed and Breakfast. Do what you must to create private time for yourselves. You want to be present in the moment and looking into the eyes of your mate.
Tip #3 Create Ambience
When I was dating my late husband, he came to visit after a long road trip with family. The ambience was evident as soon as he arrived at my house. I had soft music playing, a few candles lit, and a warm fire in the hearth. Flowers on the table and the smell of one of his favorite foods didn’t hurt a thing. All together it sent an immediate sensory message better than words, letting him know that I considered him special and looked forward to a romantic evening together.
Tip #4 Romantic Poetry or Music
Poetry has been used for ages to communicate the messages of love that we often find difficult to put into our own words. Shakespeare, Burns, Browning, the list goes on. A hand written message of love will always melt my heart. Include a poem you write yourself, or you can pick a fitting verse from a poem for someone you love. For inspiration, check out the Top 10 Famous, Romantic love Poems . Songs, or poetry set to music can be more passionate than the words by themselves. I was swept off my feet by a wonderful man as he conveyed heartfelt feelings largely through songs.
A couple of my favorites are “You Light Up My Life” sung by Debbie Boone or Whitney Houston and Frank Sinatra’s “Night and Day You are the One” (… only you neither the moon or under the sun). Both convey such beautiful romantic messages. If you are talented as a singer or musician, this is a bonus! What a wonderful way to serenade your lover.
Ideally, make available music that has meaning for you both and brings back fond memories. A romantic CD or playlist that you create just for the occasion can go a long way in creating the romantic mood that expresses your feelings.
Tip# 5 Create a Romantic View
Considering where to take your partner for the most romantic view? It’s hard to beat a romantic beach setting but some place with a great view is always desirable.
If your special occasion is in your own home, you can still create an attractive view with your table setting, your decor, and how you are dressed. Put in view a favorite photo of just the two of you. Write a love note on the wall with vinyl lettering.
Or simply write “I love you!” in a mirror with lipstick or post sticky love notes with hearts around the house. Use your imagination for a personal touch. Get dressed up even if you are not going out to a restaurant. Or, wear something seductively appropriate to your relationship.
Tip #6 Be In The Moment
Look in your partner’s eyes, hold their hand and tell them you love them! It sounds so simple, but sometimes it just doesn’t happen. If you have set your Valentine’s plans and executed them even in the most subtle ways, everything except your love for each other just fades to the background. This is what it is all about – being in the moment. Talk about happy memories and laugh together. Let heavy discussion about problems, work and family wait for another time. Some of my fondest romantic memories are associated with dancing close with my husband around our living room, listening to the music and feeling the warmth of our embrace.
Tip #7 Romantic Mood Food
Three items I consider a must are a bottle of good champagne (or wine you both like), a nice cheese and fine chocolate. Sharing food can be romantic and sexy, so consider one shared plate at least for an appetizer or dessert.
If you prefer to stay in, check out some great recipes for cooking a romantic meal at home . But,if going out, choose a restaurant that will provide all the ambience, a great view, a quiet corner, and wonderful service. A night spot that offers some live background music such as a violin or piano man is also a nice touch.
According to Frank Bonnano, a Denver chef and restauranteur
“If someone is tending to your food, your silver, your wine, your comfort, your joy, you can really tend to your partner, which really is the essence of romance.”
Maybe you know the perfect spot, but if you would like to check out some options, see the Most Romantic Restaurants in America according to Open Table or check out The Most Romantic Date Spot in Every State. For those in the Kansas City area, Feast Magazine has a list of the 10 Most Romantic Restaurants in Kansas City and Trip Savvy has a short list of 8 Most Romantic Restaurants in Kansas City. But, plan ahead to avoid settling for second best.
Taking the time to create romance with your partner is crucial to a fulfilling love life. This is just as true when there is no special occasion at all. In the end, the romance happens between the two people and it can be there whether you are on a crowded street or at romantic getaway. Ah, yes! The song says it all, “I Only Have Eyes For You” (the Flamingos)!
Have some romantic ideas of your own? Share them in the comments below.